We hurt so easily and without thinking. Very often, we do it without even realising what we've done. Hurting comes so naturally. It's almost as if we were created to do it.

But we all know that's not true, that while we are created with the capacity to hurt, we were also created with the capactiy--and purpose--to love. It's a hard fact to swallow, because the human brain doesn't like anything it cannot comprehend. And love is as incomprehensible as it gets. We see it all the time, in stories, in movies, on television. But it isn't something you simple see and go 'Oh, so that's what it is.' You've gotta experience it firsthand before learning what it truly is. And even then, we don't really have the answers.

Despite having received love, I don't know how to approach this situation with that love. We live in a world of hurt, and I am no exception. All that's been happening, with only my blog to half-vent to. I'm afraid I'll go to the meeting and make the whole thing about me. Too much talking, not enough listening.

Well, at least I managed to cross the first barrier. At least she replied. I thank God for that. In the very least, I wasn't ignored. But the Twitter messages...if they were directed at me, my heart could break. I never knew such resentment...never realised the gap between us was filled with blades. If I stumbled in, would you reach out to help me, or would you laugh, mock and scorn as I fall away?

It's a lesson, as always. This resentment that rends my soul cannot be redirected at anyone else. I have done that too often. The Chinese would say this is retribution. But no, God does not mete out punishment on His beloved ones. There is no retribution, only painful lessons.

And I thank You for this one.